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The Rational Male by Rollo Tomassi > Book Summary



  • Book Name - The Rational Male
  • Book Author - Rollo Tomassi


Strap yourselves in because after reading this article, everything you thought you knew about relationships with women is about to be turned upside-down. This is The Rational Male by Rollo Tomassi.  Picture this, You're a 23-year-old guy and you've just fallen into a relationship with a hot girl. You tell yourself you got lucky. It's three months in and everything is going great. She brings you gifts, has sex with you three times a week, and turns away guys hitting on her. But over the next month she begins paying less attention to you. The sex drops. She dresses up and goes out more often and gets angry at you for seemingly no reason. She no longer brings you gifts. She doesn't tell you she loves you, and she embraces the attention she gets from other guys. What the hell is going on here? Most guys would say women are just confusing, but that's bullshit. There is a rational explanation for her behaviour thanks to red pill philosophy. When women hop into a relationship with you, they see it as joining you on a rollercoaster ride with you as the leader. Soon they discover that you aren't leading. You try extra hard to please her by saying yes to everything she wants because you think you are being a loving boyfriend. You start skipping gym sessions, hang out with your friends less, and your goals are going to shit. The relationship dynamic results in you becoming a slave to her and this she finds extremely unattractive. To avoid these common relationship problems, Tomassi has compiled nine iron rules that are based on thousands of experiences of guys who have completely transformed their relationships.

Kicking it off with Iron Rule Nine: Never Seriously Self-Deprecate With a Woman You Intend to Be With. If you were a douchebag on a date, don't text her later saying, "Hey Stacey, I thought about what you said to me "and I have been really douchey lately. "I think back to our first date "and realise how much of a reject I was. "I hope we can start hanging out again "because I enjoy your company." This is needy, self-deprecating, and a cry for sympathy. When you act like a douchebag, own your douchebag-ness. Be the fun, nothing-is-a-big-deal douchebag. And start being less apologetic. There are situations where it makes sense to sincerely apologise, but do it with confidence and without expecting her sympathy.

Iron Rule Eight: Always Let a Woman Figure Out Why She Won't (bleep) You, Never Do It For Her. You see a hot girl and you think to yourself, "She's out of my league". Well congratulations, you just let the girl figure out why she won't (bleep) you and you haven't even opened your mouth! The idea of leagues is an illusion. If you are part of the pick up community, you know that nines and 10's are typically glass cannons. Guys value appearance and her appearance is her identity. When that identity is challenged, she loses it. That's why the pickup guys will act like they don't care when they are around beautiful girls. The girls are used to having droves of beta boys drooling over them, so when a guy ignores them or makes a cheesy remark about their appearance, they lose their minds along with their virginity for the night.

Iron Rule Seven: It Is Always Time and Effort Better Spent Developing Relations With New, Fresh, Prospective Women Than It Ever Will Be In Attempting to Reconstruct a Failed Relationship. The fact that she cheated on you or you were the optionless beta chump that had to beg her back will always be the elephant in the room. Time is better spent on a new prospective woman. You may be tempted to get her back because she is your soul mate. But soul mates are a lie. You have one-itis which is an unhealthy romantic obsession with a single person. A narrative you've been sold by Disney movies. There really are more fish in the sea.

Iron Rule Six: Women are Fundamentally Incapable of Loving a Man In The Way That a Man Expects To Be Loved By a Woman. It's time to let go of another fairytale: unconditional love. You believe that love matters for the sake of it whereas women love opportunistically. You want to be loved for who you are so you try to build your relationship into one where she loves you according to your concept, but it never happens. A guy imbued with this false belief can't tell when she no longer loves him so it's no wonder he freaks out when she breaks up with him. You can try to convince her to keep the relationship going, but you cannot force her to love you.

Iron Rule Five: Never Allow a Woman To Be In Control of The Birth. Imagine you wake up to the girl you banged last night, only to see her removing your used condom from the trash and impregnating herself with your semen. In 2002 the NBA issued a controversial warning to pro basketball players stating that the players be advised to wear condoms when having sexual intercourse with women when on road games and to flush the condom down the toilet in order to dispose of the semen. This warning was the result of multiple paternity suits involving women who had slept with the players. If you do everything in your power to avoid a pregnancy, even if the woman impregnates herself with your used condom from the trash, you are still liable for that pregnancy. Say goodbye to your money, your house, and your soul. Always use a condom and don't rely on her taking the pill.

Iron Rule Four: Never Under Any Circumstance Live With a Woman You Aren't Married To Or Are Not Planning To Marry Within Six Months You are utterly powerless in this situation. If you live with a woman you may as well be married because upon doing so every liability and accountability of marriage is then in effect. Moving in with your girlfriend is an attractive option. You save money on rent and believe you'll get a consistent supply of pussy. But then you commit to living with your girlfriend and you notice a significant decrease in her sexual availability and desire. Competitive anxiety and sexual tension is removed. She can now comfortably relax that she is your only source of sexual intimacy. She's in the perfect position to negotiate the terms of her desire in exchange for a living arrangement. You lose your two most valuable resources: options and the ability to manoeuvre.

Iron Rule Three: Any Woman Who Makes You Wait For Sex, Or By Her Actions Implies She Is Making You Wait For Sex; The Sex is Never Worth The Wait. If your girlfriend wants to (bleep) you she will find a way to (bleep) you, not make you wait until your birthday. If you are single and haven't had sex by the fifth date, then pack your bags and move on.

Iron Rule Two: Never, Under Pain of Death, Honestly Or Dishonestly Reveal The Number of Women You've Slept With Or Explain Any Detail of Your Sexual Experiences With Them To a Current Lover. Law Four of the 48 Laws of Power is Always Say Less than Necessary. Law 17 is Cultivate an Air of Mystery. By telling her how many girls you've slept with, you are breaking both laws and thus giving away your power. Keeping it to yourself plants a seed of competition anxiety in her and stokes her imagination. By revealing your previous sexual partners, you also give her ammo to use in a future argument.

And lastly Iron Rule Number One: Frame Is Everything. Always Be Aware of The Subconscious Balance of Who's Frame In Which You Are Operating. Always control the frame, but resist giving the impression that you are. Are you operating in her reality or is she operating in yours? Ideally you want her to be operating in your reality, aka, your frame. This gives you power. If you are trying to convince her to like you or have sex with you, you are operating in her frame. When girls shit test you, they are seeing if your frame is legit. For example, I bet you have a small (bleep) Clarence. Strong-framed Clarence will react unphased or may jokingly agree. Weak-framed Clarence will get offended or try to justify his (bleep) size. Men with social proof and those who accept a woman's hypergamous nature have little difficulty in establishing frame. When you enter a relationship either you will enter her reality or she will enter yours. Which will it be?

Today we discussed the nine iron rules of Tomassi.
  1. Nine, Never Seriously Self-Deprecate With a Woman You Intend to Be With. 
  2. Eight, Always Let a Woman Figure Out Why She Won't (bleep) You, Never Do It For Her. 
  3. Seven, It Is Always Time and Effort Better Spent Developing Relations With New, Fresh, Prospective Women Than It Will Ever Be In Attempting to Reconstruct a Failed Relationship. 
  4. Six, Women are Fundamentally Incapable of Loving a Man In The Way That a Man Expects To Be Loved By a Woman.
  5. Five, Never Allow a Woman To Be In Control of The Birth. 
  6. Four, Never Live With a Woman You Aren't Married To Or Are Not Planning To Marry In Within Six Months. 
  7. Three, Any Woman Who Makes You Wait For Sex, Or By Her Actions Implies She Is Making You Wait For Sex; The Sex is Never Worth The Wait. 
  8. Two, Never Reveal The Number of Women You've Slept With Or Explain Any Detail of Your Sexual Experiences With a Current Lover.
  9. One, Frame Is Everything.

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